January 2012
96 posts
Two things I learned this year:
hourglasss:
Things can get worse.
Things can also get better.
December 2011
148 posts
I have to keep reminding myself that you’re not coming home.
Pros of tonight:
Dinner at Zippy’s.
Found out I’d be seeing two of my best friends.
Cons of tonight:
I am disgusting.
I’m breathing.
Sometimes I forget that people can be absolutely amazing.
I hope you understand how blessed you are. If you hurt her, I will kick you in the face. Don’t you dare.
He’s so agitated that he ripped out his feeding tube. …Only this time we’re not putting it back in. He’s going to be on consistent doses of morphine and sedatives to give him the best quality of life that he can have at this point. It could be weeks, or it could be days.
There are moments when I feel so helpless. Helpless because I am overwhelmed with frustration, sadness, fear, anxiety, loneliness and you’re the one that I want to comfort me. Not because I need you but because you’re the one that I want to be there. And you’re that person because no matter what I’m feeling or thinking and no matter how much I push you away and refuse to...
I had such a fabulous day with Christine.
And now I’m fucking irritated.
Christmas '11.
Today we went and spent a few hours at the hospital with him to celebrate Christmas. I wasn’t entirely sure if he knew that I was there but as we were leaving I leaned down to give him a hug and tell him that I love him. I wasn’t expecting anything back considering he’s pretty much lost the ability to form sentences and speak but suddenly as I was about to leave he squeezed my...
It’s almost the new year and this year, I’m not going to let you be one of my priorities. I am going to be my own priority. I am going to love myself and treat myself the way I deserve to be treated.
This Christmas,
I’m worried to death.
So bring me some good news,
cause it’s all I’ve got left.
This Christmas by Every Avenue.
I woke up this morning to a note from my mom asking me to go pay the T-Mobile bill/shut off our service, blah blah blah. But where the hell is she? I donʻt know. She didnʻt say where she was going, nor did she leave a number for us to reach her at. Okay, thanks mom. Itʻs fucking Christmas Eve for crying out loud, do you really have to pull the whole ʻI want to leave this family but I canʻt so the...
Finally drunk. Tis the fucking season.
How I celebrate the holidays:
Drink lots of whiskey.
Listen to Punk Goes Jolly on repeat.
Bake Christmas sugar cookies.
Call Katie and cry a lot.
